I am intrigued by Board President Cheryl Chow's idea that we don't need to report crime in our schools, we only need to provide students and families with safety tips. --see this story in the Seattle P-I--
"To School Board President Cheryl Chow, it's not just a matter of timing -- she doesn't really see the point in providing crime data on individual schools. "I don't know if that would be helpful," she said, adding that it would be more beneficial to provide parents with safety tips to share with their children."
So that got me thinking about safety tips for schoolchildren and what they might be. I thought of some serious ones ("Auntie Cheryl sez: Keep your head and limbs inside the bus") and some less likely but equally useful ones ("Auntie Cheryl sez: When being kicked by a gang of thugs, roll yourself into a tight ball to protect vital organs; keep your feet tucked up tightly to protect genitals") I thought other folks might also have some Safety Tips, and we could gather them together into a smart little booklet for distribution as Board President Cheryl Chow envisioned.
I'll get us started:
Auntie Cheryl sez: When "snitching" on those who assaulted you, do so anonymously over the phone, alter your voice, and claim to be a witness rather than the victim. This may reduce the liklihood of reprisal beatings.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Carry a small amount of cash for bullies in your pocket. Keep most of your money in your shoe - unless you have nice shoes that someone might want to steal. In that case, keep your money in your underwear.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Avoid unintentional gunfire. Keep your handgun's safety in the "on" position until you are ready to fire. If it is an automatic, do not keep a round in the chamber.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Presume that your school is a dangerous place and be on the lookout at all times for possible threats.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Travel only in large groups - either for safety or for predation.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Avoid open spaces, such as parking lots.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Avoid closed spaces, such as bus stops and bathrooms.
Auntie Cheryl sez: You can pee when you get home.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Sit at the front of the bus, near the driver.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Stay out of the bus driver's lap.
Auntie Cheryl sez: You don't have to be able to outrun the bullies; you only need to be able to outrun your friends. Chose weak, slow friends and abandon them at the first sign of danger.
Auntie Cheryl sez: Surrender your liberties to a strong leader who can defend you in a dangerous world.
Anyone else have some "Safety Tips" for schoolchildren.