tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post5737657590080214462..comments2024-03-29T02:41:52.718-07:00Comments on Seattle Schools Community Forum: We Must Teach our Sons (and Daughters) BetterMelissa Westbrookhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17179994245880629080noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-87155381963255735832013-01-07T15:22:38.621-08:002013-01-07T15:22:38.621-08:00Excellent post on this in The Nation by Allison Ki...Excellent post on this in The Nation by Allison Kilkenny today.<br /><br />My favorite paragraphs:<br /><br />Occupy Steubenville is a particularly interesting phenomenon given that so much media interest has been devoted to the no-less-horrific gang rape of a young woman named Jyoti Singh Pandey in India. Establishment pundits rushed to condemn the rape, and the rape culture that permitted the attack, when it came to exotic Indian folk in a faraway land, but seem more hesitant to address rape culture within the United States, even though a shining example of women’s second-class status is on display in Ohio.<br /><br />Men who rape—and rape culture contributors who laugh about it later on Twitter and YouTube—do so precisely because they either don’t think rape is wrong (or, at the very least, raping a drunk girl “doesn’t count”) and/or they know they can rape with impunity. The “justice system” can’t work if there’s a two-tier structure where some people get punished for raping teenage girls, and others don’t simply because they happen to be football players.<br /><br />But this is the example set by the highest echelons of the NFL, mirrored down the ranks through college football, extending to small communities like Steubenville. Some members of our society are permitted to rape because we like watching them run a ball down a field, and that skill is deemed more culturally valuable than the lives and dignity of women.Louise Mnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-24534879436463356862013-01-06T21:41:17.740-08:002013-01-06T21:41:17.740-08:00Oh gosh, Molly, you can't have either been rap...Oh gosh, Molly, you can't have either been raped or had a close family member raped if you think it would be more tragic for your child to stand by idly as a witness than to be the victim of such a horrific crime. <br /><br />This is absolutely shocking. As the mother of smaller children (pre-school and younger grade school), I hope we've learned some better ways to navigate social media by the time my kids are old enough to be using it. <br /><br />As for why a group of boys - presumably not dragged up from the gutter - behaved like this collectively, I don't think it's too hard to explain, unfortunately. Think "Lord of the Flies" plus booze (and probably some other substances besides).<br /><br />-flibbertigibbetAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-36130216442795914722013-01-06T11:36:05.523-08:002013-01-06T11:36:05.523-08:00I hate hearing black youth using the "n word...I hate hearing black youth using the "n word" to eachother. Explaining to my children why it's OK for them to use it but wrong for a white person to use it made no sense because I think it's wrong for anybody to use it. But that is the way it is out there these days.Po3noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-60540603008906138502013-01-04T17:31:43.898-08:002013-01-04T17:31:43.898-08:00Not to mention the term, "retarded". Y...Not to mention the term, "retarded". You hear that so often, referencing anything that is broken. People don't even realize that it denigrates a whole class of people. People who would never say the n word, or the b word or "slut", are quite happy to call people or things retarded. The term is so denigrating that it has been removed from the DSM and from IDEA.<br /><br />-parentAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-71178044574293996412013-01-04T16:48:48.579-08:002013-01-04T16:48:48.579-08:00My 21-year old son's girlfriend (a keeper and ...My 21-year old son's girlfriend (a keeper and sometimes I like her better than my son) gave me a very funny and entertaining book for Christmas. It's Feminist Ryan Gosling, the imaginings of feminist theory through his decidedly nice eyes by Danielle Henderson.<br /><br />One, very funny.<br /><br />Two, very educational. This young woman had me Googling every other page to read about these feminists she has him speak about. <br /><br />But my favorite page (that and the one on Frida Kahlo) says:<br /><br />"Hey girl" (every page starts with that phrase)-<br /><br />"We don't call our sisters bitches."<br /><br />Because that is one thing I do not like in the young generation of girls/women. Calling your friends "bitches" or "sluts" to show affection or as a joke. <br /><br />My son's girlfriend and my niece, both say they and their friends don't do this but it is quite popular among other young women they know. <br /><br />Talk to your daughter about this.<br /><br />Talk to your son about saying, "Oh that's so gay." (I challenge you to spend a day in a middle or high school and not hear that from several boys. It's pretty common.) <br /><br />The use of denigrating language on your own friends or sex is going to continue to coarsen our society. Again, it's about respect and humanity.Melissa Westbrookhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12588239576000641336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-19932014915955024302013-01-04T16:06:44.167-08:002013-01-04T16:06:44.167-08:00The only thing more tragic than having a daughter ...The only thing more tragic than having a daughter assaulted this way, would be having a son or daughter stand by as a witness and do nothing. <br /><br />MollyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28765366.post-8441790864772435552013-01-04T14:07:37.098-08:002013-01-04T14:07:37.098-08:00I have no words to describe how I feel about this,...I have no words to describe how I feel about this, mostly blind rage coming from my lizard brain. But I wanted to say thank you for posting this, Melissa. It's very necessary. Jamienoreply@blogger.com